Retrain Your Brain

You may be happy some of the time, but you just can’t stop daydreaming about the good ol’ days. When you first started your business you were excited and happy to wake up each day. Now your business is owning you. You’re afraid to make any changes because of the consequences.

Many of us get stuck in this cycle. We are afraid to create systems that will make us happier.

If so then what is stopping you?

Download the Retrain Your Brain PDF

Internal Demons

I used to be very afraid. I was afraid that people might hate what I created. I was afraid that my family and friends would laugh at me.

My fear was so intense that I had trouble sleeping at night. I remember lying in bed at 3am and dreaming of my business thriving. I envisioned myself working with amazing clients and not worrying about money.

What a mistake!

I was so consumed with perfection that I didn’t take little steps to make my business work for me. I always wanted to create products, but I kept putting it off. Creating products fit my superpowers, but for some reason I resisted. I was afraid that my clients would buy my products and hate them.

When I finally let go of my fear and went for what would make me happy, no one was laughing. Most of my clients were encouraging. My problems were within me, not with anything external. When I stopped giving in to my fears, I began to attract like-minded people.

I found people who were launching products and they taught me how to improve my business. I also researched websites and books, and I talked to local business owners. I found coaches to help direct my business. I built my confidence back up from almost nothing.

Letting Go

You need to let go of the idea of your perfect business. There is no such thing as a perfect business. There are always jerks at every level. There are problems at every level. Rich people actually complain about being rich.

I had a friend who actually said he wished he was poor, so he wouldn’t feel obligated to pay to repair his in-laws’ car. He was half joking, but it’s true. I’ve found that rich people are more likely to complain about their lives. They often don’t appreciate the people, resources, and time that they have.

Money is not the answer to your problems. The answer lies in meeting your own needs within your business.

You need to let go of perfection by letting go of your fears. Building a business that brings you a lot of joy will take time and small steps.

Retrain Your Brain

Learning to let go of the fear and focus on the positive aspects of your business is the hardest step to making your business happiness a reality. It will take self-discipline, which may be one of the most under appreciated habits.

For the next thirty days, try to be hyper aware of your thoughts and feelings. Every time you have a self defeating thought, go through the following steps:

1. Acknowledge this thought.

2. Know that you created this idea and you get to choose how to use it.

3. Picture the thought floating into a black hole (or any image that allows you to imagine this thing disappearing).

4. Focus on a positive aspect of the present moment (i.e. a cup of good coffee, an amazing skill that you have, or the connection to friends who support you).

Take time to try this right now:

1. What is the last self defeating thought that you had? (The PDF gives space to actually write out your response)

2. Know that you created this idea and you get to choose how to use it.

3. Sit back, close your eyes and imagine this thought disappearing to never disturb your confidence again. Write down what you imagined.

4. What is one positive aspect of your present situation? (Visualize the actions and results that you get from this part of your business.)

Applying these techniques helped me stop bullying myself. I stopped wrecking my confidence and I created a more positive perspective.

Some of you may not believe in positive psychology and that’s fine, but know that your beliefs influence your actions. If you believe you can write an amazing book or build a successful business that is the first step toward making it happen.

You must learn to be your greatest fan. Once you have trust in yourself, people around you will have trust in you as well.

Next week we’ll talk about chunking your goals into small in order to that make your dream business feasible.

Download the Retrain Your Brain PDF

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* Mark Silver a wonderful man helping small business gain confidence to follow their hearts talks about using the silence to master your mind.

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